Jehovah-Jireh - God, Our Provider

Happy Thanksgiving!

I can't believe we are just a few days away from another Thanksgiving...wasn't it just the 4th of July? We are excited about being able to share Thanksgiving in our home this year with our oldest son and his family!

I hope you will forgive me for being late with a blog post, and also for writing a post today that just shares my heart. I was up and out early on this Saturday morning accomplishing my lengthy errand-and-shopping list before the day got away from me, and as I was driving I was thinking about this time last year. There is something about the holidays, Thanksgiving and New Years in particular, that make me reflect on the past year. I think what prompted my line of thinking was hearing one of my favorite songs - "Jehovah-Jireh" by Matt Whitcomb and recorded by the Hamilton family. I love these words:

"Today in this place, we seek for God's will.
We trust day by day that our cup He will fill.
And when He tells us to sacrifice our treasures here on earth,
Rich blessings are in store for us,
And joy of matchless worth."

"Jehovah-Jireh, in You we hide,
Jehovah-Jireh, You will provide!
For we know that you are with us,
Your loving hands will hold us,
We rest secure,
We place our lives within Your hands."

I actually wrote these words in my journal almost a year and a half ago after hearing this song. They were so appropriate at the time. And they still are.

Last year at Thanksgiving, we had just sold our house but we had not yet moved. My husband was commuting two hours a day to and from his new job in Richmond. I had given notice at my job because we were moving but I had no idea if and where I would be able to find a new job. We hadn't yet secured an apartment. We had no church home. Things were uncertain at best.

Today, we have moved out of the apartment that we lived in for the first ten months of our transition and have been in this house (a rental house) for about 6 weeks. My husband is still working long hours but he only has an 11 mile commute to work. I have a job that I like and that provides me with good benefits. We are serving in a local church as much as we can. As I thought about all these things, I couldn't help but think how true it is that God is our Jehovah-Jireh - He has provided. He has blessed us richly and met every need.

This month in my personal devotions, I am returning to the study "Choosing Gratitude" by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth. I first read this book and taught this study several years ago when we lived in Illinois. It impacted my life so much that I wanted (and needed) to do it again. There is a 30-day Gratitude Challenge that is included in the book, and I have gained so much from it. It is the kind of study you can do again and again. True gratitude is missing from our lives as Christians and it is life-changing. One of my favorite quotes from the book is this: "Is the gratitude that flows out of your life as abundant as the grace that flows into your life?"

Gratitude must come from a humble heart - when I am dissatisfied or resentful or comparing it is because of pride, thinking I deserve better when I don't. Having a grateful heart means sometimes we choose to be thankful when it is hard. Psalm 50:23a is encouraging - "The one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies Me." 

Along with this study I have been reading through the book of Isaiah. Chapter 40 is one of my favorites in the whole Bible. I started to highlight my favorite verses and found I was highlighting the entire chapter! It is full of the characteristics of God, and a picture of contrasts - God is described as powerful, strong, infinitely wise, everlasting, Creator, great and mighty. Yet "He will feed His flock like a shepherd, He will gather His lambs in His arms. He will carry them in His bosom and gently lead those that are with young." (verse 11) As our Shepherd, He knows what we need, and He is our provider - our Jehovah-Jireh.

Wishing you and yours a very joyful and blessed Thanksgiving,
Kathi

God of the Hills and the Valleys

If you know me personally or follow me on Facebook and are familiar with all that has been going on with us, you are probably really surprised to see this blog post. You are no more surprised than I - writing a blog post was not on my (very full) agenda for today. Just one week ago today, we moved into this house. We are only about 8 miles from where our apartment was, but there was still as much work with this move as any other. There is a world of difference being in a real house once again! And on this Saturday morning, if I ignore the stacks of boxes everywhere and the mess and the dirty windows and the lack of decor, it almost feels normal to me. I have some good music playing, I made baked oatmeal for breakfast, and best of all I have spent the last hour at my computer preparing the lesson and the outline handout for the Ladies Bible study I will be teaching this coming week.

Yes, God has answered prayer and has opened the door for me to teach ladies once again. It is only once a month, but truthfully with me working full-time that is probably a good thing. I have not taught for 18 months, and I have missed it so very much. I guess only someone who loves to write and teach as much as I do can understand how much a part of me that is. As I sat and studied and wrote this morning, it felt so normal and wonderful. My heart is full.

I wanted to share a verse with you that my attention was drawn to in my devotional time with the Lord this past month. 1 Kings 20:28 - "Thus says the Lord, Because the Syrians have said that the Lord is the God of the hills but He is not the God of the valleys, I will give all this great multitude into your hands so that you shall know that I am the Lord."

God is God of the valleys, as well as God of the mountains. These past few weeks have been full of mountains and valleys. At the end of September, our oldest son was ordained into the ministry and installed as Associate Pastor at the church that he and his wife have been at and served in ever since they were married in 2004. Being there for the weekend and witnessing the ordination and installation service that was so moving with magnificent music, meaningful Scripture readings, my brother and another bringing messages from the Word, and watching my son so confidently yet humbly saying his vows was an incredible, overwhelming experience for me as a mother. I could only think of Luke's words in Luke 2:19, "But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart."

Another mountain was seeing God provide a rental house for us, and His provision of people to help us move. I have moved many, many times in my life, but this was the first time I ever had to move while also working full-time. It seemed impossible, and it would have been if it had not been for the help we received. A sweet friend gave up an entire afternoon to help me pack for 4 hours straight. The Lord sent my brother and sister-in-law, missionaries on furlough, to visit us the last few days before we moved. They were invaluable in helping us pack, take down and re-install things, and cleaning the house before we moved in. Last Saturday we had a dozen people show up from our new church with willing hearts and hard-working bodies. God's provision was such a blessing and encouragement.

There have been valleys as well, places of deep disappointment and discouragement. Getting our things out of storage has brought some hurtful memories. Nothing is like I thought it would be at this point in our lives. But as I reflected on this verse, I had to remind myself that God is still the same God in the hard times as much as He is God of the good times. He still leads. He still provides. He still protects. He still blesses. He still is a sovereign God. If He doesn't lead through the valleys as well as the mountains, then He wouldn't be God. As I am re-studying the book of Exodus in preparation for teaching, I m reminded that just because we might be in the wilderness does not mean God is absent. Through both the mountains and the valleys, God's desire is that we glorify Him.

Thoughtfully,
Kathi

The Blessing of a Prepared Place

This may be a longer post than usual, because I have a lot to catch up on! The weeks since my last blog post have been a whirlwind. We've been home just a few days after spending a week in Oregon, a long-awaited visit to our younger son and his family who moved there about 14 months ago. We had such a great week, and I also learned a lot of interesting things about Oregon:
1) The Pacific Northwest takes their coffee very seriously! There is literally a coffee shop or kiosk on every corner, and often more than one. Everyone always seems to have a coffee cup in their hands. Which is just fine with this coffee-lover!
2) It is illegal to pump your own gas in Oregon. Yep, they come out and pump your gas, just like in the old days.
3) Since I unfortunately came down with a cold out there, I learned first-hand that you can't buy Mucinex-D in OR - it takes a doctor's prescription. However, Marijuana is legal. Go figure.
4) When you go shopping, you have to buy or bring your own reusable bags. Everywhere, not just certain stores. My husband unknowingly snagged a bag at Walmart. The idea is that if you have to buy bags, it will encourage people to use and re-use permanent, earth-friendly bags.
5) Smoke from wildfires (that we usually only hear about on the news) is very real and troublesome. It is normally clear and beautiful, but when we were visiting there were 19 different wildfires burning in Oregon, and the smoke in Eugene was horrendous. The visibility and air quality were very poor and you could even smell the smoke inside.

All in all, our week in Oregon was absolutely wonderful. We spent a day on the Pacific Coast, taking in the gorgeous scenery of the ocean, rocky coast and lighthouses, watching sea lions, and eating seafood. We also spent 2 days in Portland visiting a huge bookstore and the Oregon Zoo and enjoyed eating at a well-known restaurant. The rest of our time we spent in Eugene, where we did some more sight-seeing and ate at a couple more well-known and enjoyable places. But hands-down the most precious time was the time we spent together as a family - eating meals, talking, riding in the car, playing games, and getting re-acquainted with our grandchildren, ages 19 months and 4. We played and read books and laughed and cuddled.

As I sat in the Sunday services of the church where our son serves as youth pastor, my heart was so full. As I saw him in his place of ministry that God had prepared for him and prepared him for, I couldn't help reflecting on all the events that had brought him to this place. His acceptance of Jesus as Savior at Awana in South Carolina. The years of home-schooling. His friends and high school jobs and years of youth group and church involvement growing up in Illinois. His various ministries every summer during his college years, including his internship at the very church where he is now youth pastor! To see how God has specifically led and brought him to this place where he and his wife are now serving the Lord is a joy to this mother's heart. It isn't easy to have them on the other side of the country. When we were on the plane and I saw on the digital map the many states we were passing over - Colorado, Idaho, Nevada, Utah - and we visited the Pacific Ocean when we live just a short distance from the Atlantic, it made it very real how far away they are. But they are definitely in the exact place that God has designated for them to be in, and we wouldn't want them anywhere else.

This week John 14:2 and 3 caught my eye. Those verses talk about Jesus preparing a place for us. Of course, the place He is referring to is Heaven and He was comforting the disciples with the assurance that He would be preparing a place for them and would come again to bring them there. But how true it is that God prepares places for us to be! He prepares places where we wants us to be, whether it be a workplace, dwelling place, or ministry place, and in so doing He prepares us for those places. Jeremiah 7:7a - "I will cause you to dwell in this place."  From Genesis to Revelation, God led his people and His servants from place to place. Think of Abraham. Joseph. Moses. Ruth. Esther. Nehemiah. Paul. And Jesus. I had never stopped and thought about the significance of place before, but it is pretty mind-boggling!

There have been many times this past year when I wondered (and sometimes still do) "How did I end up here?" Not so much geographically, but a very different place from what we had planned and intended. I know many people who could echo the same. Yet, God has prepared this place for us.We have come to the conclusion that God would have us stay in this place, at least for the foreseeable future. We had thought this was only temporary. We had prayed for something different, and that He would open doors of a different place and opportunity to us. But God seems to have a different plan.

As I write this, we are once again preparing to move - this time from our 2 bedroom apartment into a rental house nearby. No, I am not thrilled about moving for the 4th time in a year (counting having moved out and back into our house and out again last year). But we have decided that if this is going to be our God-designated place, that it only makes sense that we eliminate some of the inconveniences of apartment living, gain some space, and have all of our belongings out of storage.

The blessing of place - our Heavenly Father has a place for each of us. When we walk with the Lord and seek His will, it is then a blessing to be able to rest knowing we are in our God-prepared place.

Joyfully,
Kathi

Secure in Him

Three weeks since my last blog post have sure passed quickly. The summer is almost over, as evidenced by the shorter days and school starting again. For many years, this week was the week when we would be seeing one or more of our children off to college. That was always a time of transition in our family as we adjusted or re-adjusted the size of our family and finally we were down to just the two of us. Now we have grandchildren heading back to school. Where does the time go?

I am thankful for those years of adjusting to the emptying nest, because these days transition seems to be a constant of my life. (I joke that the only thing constant in our life is change!) Because the lease on our apartment is coming up for renewal in two months, and we have to give notice of what we are going to do, we have been in the midst of some major decisions. And because so many things are out of our hands, we have had some big disappointments, especially just this week. Things that we had thought and hoped were going to happen aren't. And we are left wondering (again), "Now what do we do?"

My daughter gave me a book for my birthday which has been such a blessing to me. It is Secure in the Everlasting Arms by Elisabeth Elliott. I highly recommend it. If you know me at all, you know I am a big fan of Elisabeth and her books and quotes which contain so much wisdom. One of her most quoted sayings is "Just do the next thing", and that has been my theme lately.

One chapter in her book contains the following quote by a man named Jim O'Donnell, which was used by permission and refers to his wife's illness, but it spoke to me:

"We must learn to be faithful people in this new assignment, one we certainly never would have asked for but one which can still bless us and use us to serve our Creator and others." (emphasis mine)

I have been thinking a lot about that - the idea that even though it doesn't seem like God is using us at all at the present, He can still use us in ways that we never would have thought of or planned. Ways that are very different from having a formal ministry of teaching or speaking or mentoring, which I miss so much. And God recently gave me two instances to illustrate this. I hesitate to share these because I don't want the point to be me. I want to show how God can use us to influence others in very unlikely ways, and that we can have a ministry no matter what, as long as we have a servant's heart. Psalm 138:8a tells me, "The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me."

A couple Sundays ago, a woman I barely know at church came up to me and said she had been watching me and had noticed how I dress, and she wanted me to know she appreciated the example I was setting. I was shocked, because I never knew I was being watched. And I was even more surprised when after the morning service, my husband were in a local restaurant having lunch. I was dressed as I always do for church - a nice and modest dress with a matching jacket and jewelry. Our waitress, who was probably in her twenties, came over to our table. She looked at me and said,"Wow, you look so nice! I love the way you dress! I wish women like you could teach women my age how to dress." She went on to describe how it seems like women her age have no idea how to dress nicely or appropriately. My husband remarked after she left that those two incidents tell us that someone is always watching us, whether we are aware of it or not. God can use us in such simple ways as having a testimony in the way we dress.

The second thing that happened was yesterday at the close of my day at work, when my phone rang at the last minute and it was one of the managers. He said he just wanted to compliment me on the nice job I was doing and how well I handled the customers. I about dropped the phone, but it made my day. Again, I had no idea I was being watched. God can use us in the way we speak and treat others.

The point of this is not that I know how to dress or that I do a good job at work. The point is that God can use us in many ways, and sometimes those ways are totally unexpected or totally different than what we are used to. Someone is always watching us or looking to us for our reaction. But we need to be open and willing to do what He has for us.

And that brings me back to the title I gave this post - Secure in Him. Because that is what it always comes back to. It all depends on an attitude of trusting Him. I love Psalm 139, and a verse I read and meditated on this week which goes along with this is verse 5, "Thou has beset me behind and before, and lay thy hand upon me." The phrase "beset me" also means "hem me in." I love the picture of being "hemmed in" by the Lord. He holds the boundaries. He won't let us unravel (it sure feels like everything is unraveling!). He controls both the past and the future. If we really believe that, then we can be open to what He has for us.

Controlling Our Portion

A couple days ago I marked the 4 month anniversary of beginning my new job working for the County planning department. Four months have sure flown by quickly. Working full-time after working part-time and having been a mom and/or a pastor's wife at home for so many years has necessitated a lot of changes in many areas of my life. Most of the adjustment has gone quite well. But one area that I can't seem to figure out is how to avoid gaining weight when I am sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day.

You don't need to flood me with comments and advice on how to lose weight. I know all the right things to do. I'm actually a Lifetime Member of Weight Watchers. I'm a naturally healthy eater - I love all fruits and vegetables, I don't eat many high-fat foods because I don't digest them well, and I TRY to stay away from sugar. I drink water. It comes down to one thing: portion control. I simply eat.too.much for someone who is as sedentary as I am, especially given my age which brings with it a lower metabolism. I feel better when I work out, but fitting in time for regular exercise with my work schedule is hard. So these days I am trying to remember to reduce my portion sizes.

I was reminded of this the other morning as I was having my Bible reading and came to Psalm 16. Psalm 16 contains a lot of great verses, but verse 5 especially caught my attention: "The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup, You hold my lot." That has the idea that when we walk with the Lord, He assigns us the specific portion He has for us, a little at a time, and in so doing He makes my lot, or the whole picture, secure. Jeremiah 13:25 says, "This is your lot, this portion have I measured out for you, declares the Lord." When we have a portion, we have a measured, limited amount, rather than getting an unlimited amount of everything at once (think buffet restaurants). Likewise, God seldom lets us preview everything that He has in store for us. And that's a good thing.

Elisabeth Elliot says in her book Secure in the Everlasting Arms, "We are meddling with God's business when let all manner of imagining loose, contemplating possibilities instead of just following one day at a time God's plan and simple pathway. When we try to meet difficulties prematurely, we have neither the light nor strength for them yet."

Those are wise words. Just like those controlled meal portions, the Lord lovingly and graciously measures out for us His plan for the day, one day at a time. We often would like to glimpse God's plan for our future, but the Lord knows it is too much for us to take in all at once. Accepting the portion that God gives us each day is one way that He stretches our faith. 

Not only have I been at my job for 4 months, but it has now been over a year since we left our ministry. We have a deadline looming this fall of deciding whether or not we are going to keep this apartment for another year, and we are earnestly seeking the Lord's will and plan. We have learned many things on this journey we have been on this past year, and one of them is this: the best way we can prepare for the uncertainties of the future is to be faithful today. God desires faithfulness doing whatever He gives us as our assigned portion for the day. The opportunities we have right now to serve the Lord are few, and they are small compared to what we used to do, but we know God requires faithfulness of us. In everything.

I had originally been thinking about posting some new recipes for you today, because I haven't done that in a long time. But no matter how good they are, that doesn't seem to fit with a post about weight and portion control! Instead, I will close with some verses that have been special to me this week:

Psalm 33:11, 20-21: "The counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of His heart to all generations. Our soul waits for the Lord, He is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in Him, because we trust His holy name."

Til next time,
Kathi

An Unfinished Story

If you know me at all or have been following this blog for awhile, you know that I am a huge proponent of journaling. I began journaling over 25 years ago while under the mentoring of my dear pastor's wife when my husband was in school, and it has become an important piece of who I am. Journaling crystalizes your thoughts, helps you to apply God's truth to your life, and provides a permanent reminder of all the experiences, blessings, and lessons that you might otherwise forget. If you want to know more about journaling, you can look back at some of my earlier posts.

This morning as I was having my quiet time with the Lord, I noticed I only have 1 more page left in my journal. I started writing in this particular journal over a year and a half ago, and much has happened since then. Our lives have completely changed. And in between that first page and now my next-to-last page, I have chronicled my spiritual journey every step of the way.

As I stared at that one last blank page in the book, I couldn't help but think how nice it would be if I could just finish the story. If I could wrap up all the events of this tumultuous past year and bring it all to a tidy, happy, logical conclusion on the final page of my book.

That is obviously not going to be the case.

Our lives are a story in progress, a story that God began writing and won't finish until we are at home in heaven with Him. I am reminded of Phil. 1:6 - "He who hath begun a good work in you shall perform it until the day of Jesus Christ." So often, when I can't figure things out and can't see any possible good outcome,  I want to jump ahead and know the end of the story, much like being immersed in a good suspenseful book when we want to skip ahead to the end and see how everything is resolved. The problem is, we become so intent on knowing the outcome that we often miss the details along the way. One of the biggest lessons I have learned this past year is that God's biggest work is often done IN us, not through us. Only God knows the twists and turns and the plans that He has for us. Each day is a new chapter. Each day brings new events that are beyond our control, and often far beyond anything we might imagine.

Such was the case this past Tuesday, July 4. Our older son and his wife and their 4 children were visiting us for the first time since we had moved to our new home. We had made plans for the day and evening for how we wanted to celebrate the holiday. We needed to drive two vehicles because there were 8 of us, so my husband and I drove ours, with the three older grandchildren in the backseat. Our son and his wife and their 1 year old followed in theirs. We were driving along on a perfectly beautiful, sunny, hot day when out of nowhere, a tree came crashing down on us. There was no escaping it. My husband did a great job and kept driving, trying to beat the impact, instead of coming to a halt in which case the impact may have been greater. The tree landed on our roof, shattered our windshield, and did major damage to the front end and entire passenger side of our vehicle. Our son and his wife who were following us saw the whole thing happen.

God was gracious to us. We were shaken up, but we were not hurt. Miraculously, we were all fine. The police office informed us that was not the usual outcome. Our vehicle was not fine. It had to be towed, and it has since been declared a total loss. Because of the July 4 holiday there were no rental car places open, so we all had to squeeze into our son's SUV for the 1-hour trip home. This was not a chapter in the story that I would have planned to write.

Friends, there is no way when I got up that morning I could have foreseen that happening to us. It was part of God's story for us - a part that was definitely not in our version of the story. It reminded me how powerless and out of control we are. It was such a horrible feeling to see that tree come toward us and there was absolutely nothing we could do to stop it. Likewise, we are often completely helpless and powerless at the events in our lives. And most often, we do not know the end to the story. We can only trust.

This week I was moved once again by the first stanza of the familiar hymn, Jesus Paid it All:

"I hear my Savior say,
thy strength indeed is small.
Child of weakness, watch and pray.
Find in Me your all in all."

As much as we would like to know the end of the story, we are powerless to make that happen. God is writing our story, and it is a work in progress, and written in a way only He can. Our job is to trust (so much easier to say than to do!) and to make Christ our all in all.

With a heart of gratitude,
Kathi

How Firm a Foundation

I wasn't planning to write a blog post this morning. I was hoping to get one out soon, but this morning I had other plans. The sun is shining. Tomorrow is my birthday. (A window just popped up on my computer to remind me of that!) I should be feeling great.

Instead I am battling feelings of frustration, even in the midst of trying to have a grateful heart.

I am very thankful for how far we have come this past year. God has been and continues to be faithful. But that doesn't mean that things are easy. I am thankful that my husband has a job, but frustrated because he is working far too many hours, and his schedule requires him to rotate between early mornings (as in 4 am) and late nights (as in after midnight). When he is finally home he is doing paperwork or sleeping. That means we seldom see each other, and even more seldom do we get to do anything together. Big change for a couple who has been married almost 42 years, and has served side by side in ministry for 22 of them.

I am thankful for my sister in law being able to leave the Marshall Islands where she and my brother serve as missionaries to come home and help my mom care for my dad, who broke his vertebrae in a fall, following having broken his ribs in another fall. I was even doing fine with God not allowing it to be me being there with my mom to be the caretaker right now, when I wanted to so badly. A sweet friend reminded me that this is God's time to give my sister in law the blessing of doing that. But now that he has been moved back from rehab into the SICU last night due to shortness of breath and dropping of oxygen levels which was causing him even more confusion, I am feeling frustrated that I can't even go see my dad for a long weekend because I am too far away unless I can get time off work.

This morning when I was asking the Lord for His help in all this, He brought to me the words to the hymn "How Firm a Foundation." I know it was Him, because I had not even been thinking about hymns. These are the words that ministered to my heart:

How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord,
Is laid for your faith in His excellent Word.
What more can He say, than to you He hath said,
To you who for refuge to Jesus have fled?

Fear not, I am with thee, O be not dismayed,
For I am thy God, and I will still give thee aid.
I'll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand
Upheld by my gracious, omnipotent hand.

When through the deep waters I call thee to go,
The rivers of sorrow will not overflow.
For I will be with thee, thy trials to bless,
And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.

When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,
My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply.
The flame shall not hurt thee, I only design
thy dross to consume and thy gold to refine.

(My hymn book says "Author Unknown")

I am reminded once again of the firm foundation which is laid for me in the form of my personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

At a family funeral a few weeks ago, I was also reminded of the Godly foundation which was laid for both my husband and me in the form of Christian homes and a Godly heritage. As we listened to a graveside message that clearly proclaimed the gospel, we realized that not all families are privileged to hear that. As we wandered the cemetery and found the graves of my husband's grandparents and great-grandparents, who knew the Lord to the best of our knowledge, we realized anew the Godly foundation that had been given to my husband. It was an incentive to me to pray even more for this Godly foundation to be seen in our lives for our grandchildren.

As one of my favorite verses says,"God is my refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear, though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea.." (Psalm 46). Thank you, Lord, that You are my firm foundation!

Prayerfully,
Kathi

When You've Been There

Hello dear readers! I've missed being able to write my blog as frequently as I used to.  In this new chapter of life, a full-time job takes up most of my time, and my hours outside of work are spent with my husband and maintaining my home. There is a familiar verse which has taken on new meaning for me as I have been meditating on it recently: 1 Thess. 5:18 - "In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." Although I may be doing something other than what I would like to be doing with my life right now, and at times I feel like I am missing out on so much, because I know that this is God's will for me at this time I can have (or at least try to have!) a positive attitude of thanksgiving. We all have circumstances in our lives which are not to our liking. It isn't easy, but if we remember that everything is ordered by the Lord and is His will for us right now, that goes a long way toward helping us to be content.

The other day at work I was speaking to a customer on the phone and was attempting to give them directions to a meeting that was being held at another location. I have a good resource book that I use to give directions, but because I have never personally been to the place in question, when the customer began asking specific questions I had to hand the call off to someone else who had actually been there and was better able to help them. I couldn't help but notice the correlation between actually having "been there" and the ability to answer their questions.

Did you ever notice that when you are talking to someone and you find that you both have been to the same place, you have an instant rapport with them? You compare notes and swap stories about where you've been, as only those who are intimately acquainted with a place can do.

Likewise, when we share a common life experience with someone, it puts us in a unique position to relate to that person in a special way. That's why support groups are so popular - we know that others who are or have been in our same situation can really understand and relate to what we are going through. I am convinced that God's design for us is to use all the experiences that He gives us to minister to others who might be going through similar circumstances. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 says, "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we may be able to comfort those who are in affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God."

How can we use our having "been there" to minister to someone else?

Remember -"this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." This is what God has for you right now, and remember that His desire is that we glorify Him in everything. One way of doing that is remembering that because God has equipped us with having "been there," we in turn may be able to help and comfort others who are going through similar trials.

Reach out - It is very easy to get wrapped up in our lives, to feel like we are the only ones going through this, and to shut others out. There is no lack of opportunity to minister to others, only a lack of vision. We need to be looking for people who may be experiencing what we have already been through and for opportunities to encourage them. If we realize that God may have a ministry for us of encouraging others as a result of our having "been there," we need to actively pray and seek to be used by Him.

Rely on the Lord - Rely on the Lord for wisdom and for help in being a blessing to others. As a pastor's wife I used to worry about saying the right things and having the right answers when it came to helping others. I remember when I finally realized I didn't have the answers or the ability to help people, and that only God did. I felt like a huge weight was lifted off me. I don't have all the answers - and you don't either - but God does, and all we need to do is point people to Him. Relying on the Lord in our weakness is what Paul was talking about in 2 Cor. 12.

What have you experienced in your life that God can use to encourage someone else? Infertility? The death of a spouse, parent, or child? Being a care-giver? Losing a job? Children leaving the nest? Illness? Moving?  Have you been there? You can help someone else who needs your encouragement.

Til next time,
Kathi

Giving Up Control

I have an amazing husband. I really do.

Some of you may have seen my post on Facebook about the wonderful dinner he cooked and served me when I came home from work one evening this week. He cleaned up the kitchen, too! He has never hesitated to pitch in and help, whether it be cooking or dishes or laundry.

During the course of our marriage, I have always pretty much taken charge of the house and all the related tasks. I thoroughly enjoy everything about homemaking, and after 41 years I am pretty good at it. But since I began working full-time a couple months ago, we really have been working together as a team. If he gets home from work before I do, he cooks. If he's working at night and home during the day, he'll do some of the laundry or run to the grocery store instead of me having to do it. When it comes to the finances and bill paying, I have always taken care of that as well, but now he might be the one who goes to the bank or pays the bills.

Don't misunderstand me! I am definitely not complaining! I am very blessed to have that kind of a husband. But for me, there is a difficult side to this. I have been doing these things for a very long time - and I am used to having complete control over what I do. He often doesn't do things the way I do. No longer being in charge means that sometimes I have items on my grocery list and I look in the refrigerator or pantry and see my husband has already bought them. I don't know what clothes are clean and what is still in the hamper. I have to check to see the status of our finances. After so many years, it is a bit of an adjustment to not feel in control of things at home.

Losing control can be an uncomfortable feeling but it is ultimately a good thing. Likewise, often I have struggled with the Lord over who is in control of my life. I have my plans and my idea of how things should go and how they should turn out. And more often than not, life doesn't go that way. Never have I been so out of control of my life as I have been this past year, when everything suddenly changed and nothing turned out as we had planned. In fact, that is one thing that the Lord has really driven home to me these past months: We may plan and we may think we are in control, but God's plans will stand. Proverbs 16:9 - "The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." And Proverbs 19:21 - "Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." 

Plans - it's kind of ironic that I work for the county planning department and I work around plans every day. Plans are something that we  put a lot of thought and work into, and we think they should be set in stone. But when we give our lives to the Lord, we need to realize that we are no longer in control. God desires that we submit our will to His. And God in His love and wisdom does a much better job at being in control of our lives. While we may have Plan A, God's plan is really Plan A, even though it may be quite different than ours. And God's plan is always better.

I am reminded of the words to this song that is sung by Mac and Beth Lynch:

With my whole heart I humbly seek you;

Now use my life, O Lord, I pray.

I yield my stubborn will completely,

May your commandments light my way.

My life, Lord, is yours to control;

I give you my heart and my soul.

I'll seek your will, never mine,

Rich treasure to find.

Give wisdom to choices I make,

Along every path that I take.

So when I complete life's race,

"Well done" you will say.

And in the end, that's what it's all about.

Lovingly,

Kathi

The Roses and the Thorns

This week marks 7 weeks since I began working full-time. Along with that, somehow it seems like time is passing even more quickly than it used to. Am I the only one wondering how it is possible that it is already May and that this Sunday is Mother's Day?

Last Saturday I had the opportunity to visit the Botanical Gardens with a group of ladies from church. The day's cold and cloudy weather was not lovely, but the flowers were, especially the large variety of gorgeous orchids blooming in the conservatory.

After enjoying a considerable amount of time in the conservatory, I became separated from my group so I spent a few minutes wandering alone in the rose gardens, which were beautiful. I observed how exquisitely each petal was formed, and the endless varieties and shades of beautiful colors. I marveled at our great Creator who designed such beauty and perfection. I asked myself how I could ever think that a God powerful enough to create something so intricate and beautiful could not take care of me?

But at the same time I was admiring the roses, I touched one to bring it up close to take a picture and instantly the thorns pricked my fingers. And my attention immediately turned from the beauty of the rose to the pain. As I thought about this later, I couldn't miss the significance. The beauty was still there, unchanged, but my focus had shifted to the thorns. The Lord made me realize that so often I do the very same thing. There may be blessings all around me, but I am stuck in the thorns.

In Numbers 11:5 we read how the children of Israel looked back and cried over the things they used to have in Egypt and now missed. "We remember the fish we ate in Egypt freely, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions and the garlic." But in verse 6, they continued on:"But now our soul is dried away and there is nothing at all except this manna!" They were so immersed in the past that they completely missed what God was doing for them in the present.

We tend to be critical of the Israelites for reacting in such a way, after all God has done for them. But if I am honest, I can so relate to this. Often lately I am feeling sad over what I used to have that I no longer do. Little things, like a yard to enjoy this time of year. My nice top of the line kitchen appliances, because I love to cook and bake. The spaciousness of my house. And bigger things - time with my husband. Free time to do the things I love, like blog and scrapbook and bake. And especially the time and opportunity to visit and attend all the special events of our grandchildren. These are my thorns.

But what about the roses? We may not have a yard, but we don't have to be concerned with mowing and keeping it up either. My appliances are not deluxe or have the features I want, but they are new. Our apartment may be small, but we have a home (which doesn't take much time to clean!) I don't have much free time anymore, but I have a job. And while I miss time with my husband, I still HAVE a husband, as well as beautiful, healthy grandchildren.

I am reminded of my theme for this year - contentment. I recently read that"Comparison kills contentment." And it's true. That includes comparison of the past and the present. We sometimes need to remind ourselves to shift our focus from the thorns to the roses. That will go a long way in helping us learn to be content. God is faithful and pours His blessings out on us over and over again. We just need to see them.

Til next time,
Kathi

The Older Woman and Mentoring

Hello! It's a beautiful, warm sunny spring evening here which is very welcome after an extended onslaught of heavy rain. This past weekend I made a quick trip by myself to spend a day with my brother who is a missionary serving literally on the other side of the world. He was only in the States for another couple of days, and I hadn't seen him in nearly 2 years, so after work last Friday evening off I went. It was a fast but good weekend with him and with my daughter and her family, but then that rain moved in on Sunday and made for a long, stress-filled trip back home. My husband is out of town for work, so it's been a LONG week here by myself!

If you fall into the category of one of my younger readers, you may not really understand or relate to the first part of this post. But as I have been reflecting over the past couple of weeks, I have felt keenly aware that I have entered into the realm of "older women." I'm not really sure why my age has become so apparent to me. It's not like it happened overnight! I do have 10 grandchildren, after all! Maybe it was going to the eye doctor recently and learning that my vision has gotten worse again and I need not only a new pair of glasses, but a second pair for when I am working on the computer. Maybe it's the five pounds I have recently put on which drive me crazy and I can't seem to get rid of. Maybe it's seeing other women with cute haircuts or stylish outfits and then realizing that they are probably my daughter's age. Maybe it is because I am not quite as fast to learn new things as I always have been. I've been talking to new friends and realizing I am quite a few years years older than they are. Regardless of what led to this realization, it's a new feeling to look around and realize I am one of the older women there. I still feel the same as I always have - well, most of the time anyway!

There are, however, certain advantages to being older - although I'm not yet old enough for some senior discounts or medicare. I have learned a lot, experienced a lot, and know how to do a lot of things. I have more confidence and am not as easily shaken. I know what I am good at and what I am not. I have been married for 41 years. I have acquired a fair amount of wisdom. Most importantly, because I became a Christian at a very young age I have had over 50 years to walk with the Lord. There is nothing more precious than that!

I'm what Titus 2:3-5 refers to in the KJV as an "aged" (or mature) woman. I love it that God gives direction in His Word to women and what He expects of them. And specifically, He has entrusted to us older women the responsibility of mentoring the younger women in our lives. Susan Hunt in her book Spiritual Mothering defines mentoring as "investing in the lives of others in a nurturing way that we share the gospel as well as our lives with them." It means showing them how it's done, and sharing our lives. It goes back to the Biblical mandate of one generation teaching the next the goodness of the Lord. It means taking a personal interest in the younger women around us and being willing to invest ourselves in them. As a younger woman, it is so helpful to have someone come alongside who has already walked the road we are walking and can give some insight as well as some practical help. As an older woman, it gives purpose to our lives to be able to share the benefit of what we have already experienced.

So what kind of things are we to mentor in? Titus 2:3 says we are to be "teachers of good things." The word that is translated "teacher" has the idea of both personal example and Godly wisdom. The "good things" are actually the characteristics that are listed in Titus 2:4-5. There are so many ways that we can come alongside and encourage the younger women in our lives in their marriages, their mothering, and their walk with the Lord. All it requires is a willingness to invest in others, and some time and creativity on our part.

So as for me, I'm going to change my perspective on getting older. I want to be able to be a blessing and invest in the younger women God brings into my life with the intention of helping them and glorifying God in the process. After all, that is His perfect plan.

Thoughtfully,
Kathi

More Than These

Good morning! It's a beautiful sunny spring Saturday morning here, and it's been too long since I have been at the blog. It has been an eventful few weeks, but more on that later. This weekend is Easter weekend - that time when we reflect on what Jesus did for us on the cross. He paid the ultimate price for our sin with His own life, but He is alive! Without the resurrection we would still be without hope!

This past week in preparation for Resurrection Sunday, in my quiet time with the Lord I have been re-reading passages about the crucifixion and resurrection and meditating on them. I parked for awhile in John 21. It was after the resurrection and Jesus had just revealed Himself to His disciples.  Put yourself in their place and think about how they must have felt. They had been completely broken and discouraged at the death of their beloved Jesus. I can't begin to fathom their joy when they finally understood who He was and that He really was alive. But it was verse 15 that really stopped me, when Jesus put this question to Peter: "Lovest thou me more than these?"

"More than these". I couldn't stop thinking about what the "these" refers to. I think it means anything that we are loving and holding onto more than the Lord. Those things that keep us from loving Him and trusting Him like He wants us to. I think "these" is different for all of us.

This Easter is once again a first for us - the first time in 22 years that we are not celebrating the Resurrection with a congregation that my husband is pastoring. Easter weekend was always one of my favorite, and also one of the busiest, times of the year for us. My husband always liked having a Good Friday service, and we also often had Easter sunrise services. I recall many years and precious memories of Easter breakfasts, cantatas, and special services. It was busy, but we loved it - and we truly did those things with the intention of giving God the glory for the death and resurrection of His Son. I miss those times so much.

Along with missing ministry life, as I already mentioned the past three weeks have been full of events both good and bad. Last weekend, I was privileged to have the wonderful opportunity to speak at a Mother-Daughter Luncheon at a church in northern Maryland. I thoroughly enjoyed it and the Lord was so gracious in giving me clarity of thought and the words to hopefully encourage the ladies there in their walk with the Lord. He also answered my prayers for safety since I drove up and back by myself. Again, I haven't had the opportunity to speak or teach for a year and for one who loves it as much as I do, that has been hard. I am trying just to wait upon the Lord and trust Him.


Two weeks ago tonight, I took my husband to the emergency room in the middle of the night for chest pains and pressure that he began experiencing at work. The doctors were concerned because he has an extensive family history of heart disease and because of his symptoms. It was a stress-filled two nights and two days in the hospital while many tests were run, and we were so grateful when all of the results came back that it was not heart related and he was released.

Presently my husband is at the doctor for a bad burn he got on his arm at work a few weeks ago that has become badly infected. He has a busy week of work ahead of him, and then will be out of town working at another restaurant location for a week. So now you can see what I mean about it being a crazy time for us here. And while all this is going on, I am still adjusting to my job and a new routine working full-time.  I can't help but think about the differences between a year ago and now, and these events being a part of His plan for us.

As I ponder all of this, the answer to the "more than these" question came to me. For me, the "these" means the past and all the unanswered questions. I think the Lord was asking me if I love Him more than wanting to know the answers. Do I love HIM more than I love the ministry? Do I love HIM more than things I don't have anymore and more than people that I miss? This has been such a convicting question for me to mull over.

We all have the "these" in our lives which threaten to keep us from loving God like we should. It may be our possessions, our home, our families, our friends, our jobs, our hopes and dreams...the list is endless. Once we recognize that there are "these things" that we love more than we love Him, we then need to surrender them to Him and learn to trust even those things to His wise providence.

Happy Resurrection Sunday!

Love,
Kathi

The Path I Take

"Oh, how abundant is thy goodness which thou hast stored up for those who fear thee, which thou has wrought for those who trust in thee, in the sight of the sons of men!" Psalm 31:19

It seems like a long time since I have been at the blog, but in reality it's been about the same amount of time as usual. A lot has been packed into this week. As I begin a new chapter in my life of working full-time, my blog posts might become a little less frequent or a little shorter, but it is still my intention and desire to continue writing this blog on a regular basis. I now have completed my first week at my new job! Actually, yesterday was my first full day of being in the office the entire day because I had to complete 2 1/2 days of extensive new employee orientation classes. Because I work for a government entity, there was required training in things like ethics, security, conflicts of interest, and protocol, in addition to the usual employee training in responsibilities, policies, and procedures. It has only been a few days, but I am already very much enjoying my job! The environment is very pleasant, my co-workers are really nice and friendly, and the work of talking with and assisting various customers is enjoyable and challenging without being stressful. It's fun to dress up for work every day, to be learning new things, and to be meeting new people. I'm so thankful for the grace of the Lord in His provision of this new job for me!

Something that has become so very evident to me in the past week is that the Lord definitely has had His hand on me and our circumstances the past few months. Of course, we already knew that. But sometimes it is just a special encouragement to be able to SEE it! My job that I had for the short time before we sold our house and moved from Williamsburg was the perfect preparation for the job I have now. At the time, I wondered why I got that particular part-time job, especially when I ended up being there for such a short time. The Lord knew what He was doing - He had a plan! He knew I needed the experience of working in a local government setting, as well as the letter of recommendation I received, because both were instrumental in me being hired for my present job. Not only that, but I learned some procedures as well as some vocabulary and acronyms that I am using now - and I never would have known without having worked at that job. I work for the planning division of the 4th largest county in Virginia and deal with plans every day, but I couldn't have planned that if I tried.


God is always faithful to direct our path. When I think back a few months to when we were in complete upheaval, and all that has taken place since then, I can only praise Him for the way He has led us. In the course of daily life we find ourselves often having to change paths, or choose the path that we will take. There are many Scripture verses that talk about those paths. Probably the one we think of the most is Proverbs 3:6, "In all they ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths." That's a promise that we can depend on. It is comforting to know that as our Shepherd in Psalm 23, He will also lead us in the paths of righteousness.

As I think about these things, another verse of Scripture comes to mind. Psalm 16:11 says, "Thou will show me the path of life, in Thy presence is fulness of joy, at Thy right hand are pleasures forevermore." That verse reminds me that although the Lord is faithful to lead us in the right path if we pray and sincerely seek His will, that the real place of peace and joy is in His presence. It's easy to become distracted with the path that we are on and forget that it is God who set us on that path in the first place. We should never come to the place where we stop depending on Him.

When you are looking for the right path, remember that God has a plan. He knows the path we should take. Commit your ways and your decisions to Him and He will never let you down!

Taking the Time

We had a special milestone in our home last week - my husband celebrated his 60th birthday. I considered writing this whole post about him, but I knew he wouldn't like that. Besides, I also turn 60 this year and I know I don't really want that much attention given to it! Because of our work schedules, we had to divide up his birthday celebration. We went to lunch on his actual birthday, and then we were able to go to our older son's home this past weekend. He cooked a fabulous birthday dinner (how about steak and homemade crab cakes?) and we had a wonderful time playing with our 4 grandchildren, attending church services together, and just enjoying some special family time.

As my  husband and I sat across the table from each other the other day at lunch, I remarked how unbelievable it was that we met when we were only 16 or 17 (we got married young after high school graduation), and now we are 60! We have been together for basically a lifetime. One of the many things that is special about my husband and has contributed to the success of our marriage is that he always has taken time for me and for the kids. Even when he was simultaneously a full-time student preparing for the ministry and working full time, he always made family time a priority, even if it was just playing a game, a bike ride around the block, or a trip for ice cream. When he was a student, he would have the kids help him study. When he had to work, he would give them little jobs to do so they could be with him. How thankful I am that now I see that same characteristic in all three of our grown children as they are parents! They always take time to play, to listen, to have family Bible time, and to explain and teach.

As I have been working in the restaurant industry the past few weeks before beginning my new job next week, I learned a great many things - besides the fact that I don't enjoy that kind of work! My last evening working I observed two customers in particular. One was a grandfather who brought his two toddler grandchildren into the restaurant for supper - alone! He was rather overwhelmed, to say the least, and was very apologetic about asking for two high chairs, more napkins, wet wipes, and all things that eating out with toddlers require - but he was obviously thrilled to have this special time alone with his grandchildren. The other customer was a young father with his daughter who was upper-elementary school age, perhaps 9 or so. He carried on an animated conversation with her about school, her friends, and what interesting things had happened that day - he was unmistakably genuinely interested in her. I couldn't help but overhear and smile as I cleaned tables nearby.

Why did I especially notice these customers? It was because they were the rare example of parents (or grandparents) who were taking time for their children. Over the past few weeks, I have observed that 90 percent of the families who came in to eat spent the whole time on their phones! Each of the parents, and the children if they were young teens or older, would be glued to their respective phones and barely speak a word to each other the entire time! If the children were young, the parents would give the children an Ipad or a video game to occupy them, and then proceeded to spend the entire time on their phones. I can't tell you the number of times I wanted to scream, "Put down the phones! Look at your kids! Talk to them! Don't you know how quickly these years pass and you are not taking the time to know your kids, much less parent them!"  I cringe to think what kind of relationship they will have (or more accurately, won't have) with their children, and what kind of parents their kids will become.

There are many passages of Scripture that speak to passing on the things of the Lord to the next generation. We are familiar with Deuteronomy chapter 6 in which God commands us to teach our children about Him. One of my favorite verses, which I have written about here on the blog before, is Psalm 78:4 - "We will not hide them from our children, showing to the generations to come the praises of the Lord, and His strength, and His wonderful works that He hath done." Verses 6 and 7 continue the thought: "That the generation to come might know them, even the children which shall be born who should arise and declare them to their children, that they might set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God but keep His commandments." Psalm 89:1 - "I will sing of the Lord forever, with my mouth will I make known thy faithfulness to all generations." Parents, you will never accomplish this with your children without taking time for them.

Maybe your children are grown and out of your home. We still need to be reminded that relationships are to be our priority. They are a gift from the Lord. One of the benefits of the recent changes in our life which began last summer is that we try to have a sharing and praying time together on a more regular basis. Now that we have opposite work schedules for awhile, we have to be more intentional about it. You cannot achieve intimacy in your marriage without making time for each other for meaningful communication, and also for having some fun together.

Time is important to God. There are many references to it in His Word. Psalm 90 in particular has a lot to say about how quickly time passes and culminates with verse 12: "So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom."  I hope you will remember to just take the time.

Thoughtfully,
Kathi

Being Found Faithful

"This is the Lord's doing, it is marvelous in our eyes." (Psalm 118:23) Isn't that a great verse? The word marvelous in this verse has the idea of wonderful or extraordinary, something that only God can do!

This has been a big week for us as we continue taking steps in this journey.

The week brought a special blessing for me, in that the Lord answered prayer and I received a job offer as a result of an interview I had for a job I really wanted. I accepted the offer and am excited about beginning my new job in 2 weeks.  It is a job that is very different from the one I have had the last few weeks - one that is more fitting to my skills, experience, and personality; is easier on me physically than the one I have been coming home exhausted from being on my feet and doing physical work for 8 hours; and one which will be of greater benefit to us financially. It was also so encouraging to me to see once again the sovereign hand of the Lord in our lives over the past few months. The job that I had before leaving Williamsburg was definitely in the providence of God - I was not there very long, but I gained necessary experience in a government setting, as well as a recommendation from my supervisor there. Both were instrumental in my being chosen for this job. God is so good to let us sometimes see that He indeed is with is and is working out His plan for us, even though at the time it may not seem that way.

And as we continue taking steps, yesterday we took a big one as we became members of the local church we have been attending. If you have been following my blog, you will know that we have been through a lot the last 8 months. But for me, more than any other change, the decision to join a church was the hardest one. Harder than selling our beautiful house and moving into an apartment. Harder than downsizing and having half of our belongings in a storage unit indefinitely (even though I just had to go out and buy all new cake pans because somehow my cake pans did not make it to our apartment and are buried in the mountain somewhere in the storage unit!) Harder than having to go back to work full-time.

The whole church-searching process was difficult. Partly because good, conservative, Bible-preaching churches are very hard find these days. If you are members of one, you are blessed. Don't take it for granted. It was also difficult because due to either being in school (when my husband was on staff of a large church so we did not have to make the church-membership decision) or being in the pastorate, we had not had to search for a church home for over 30 years - since our children were babies! I have learned a lot. I know what it's like to get up every Sunday and think, "So where are we going to go to church today?" I know what it's like to feel like an outsider at church services and events. I know what questions to ask and what to look for, when you are tired of having to critique churches. I know what it's like to cry coming home from church because no one spoke to me the entire time I was there. (That was not the case in every church we visited, and certainly not in the one we just became members of - I want to make that clear!) But if the Lord calls us to another ministry, I always want to remember what it feels like to be on "the other side." It will help me to be a better pastor's wife.

But for me it was especially hard to take the step of becoming a member of another church because it means my husband is no longer my pastor.  It means the official end of our ministry - that after almost 25 years of pastoring we are no longer pastoring, but part of a congregation.  But joining a church was an important and necessary step to take. Why?

Because the Lord requires that His people align themselves with a local church as a place to be spiritually nourished and to serve. And the Lord requires that His servants be found faithful.  I have been studying verses related to and meditating on faithfulness. It is clear from the number of verses and parables on the subject of faithfulness that God prizes it.  Just a sampling: 1 Corinthians 4:2 "Moreover it is required of stewards that they be found faithful." Luke 16:10 - "One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much..."  Acts 11:23 - "When he (Barnabas) came and saw the grace of God, he was glad and exhorted them to remain faithful to the Lord with steadfast purpose." Matthew 25 contains the parable of the faithful servant. Someday I want to hear the words, "Well done, good and faithful servant!"

Many years ago as part of my husband's ordination service, our son sang the song "May the Lord Find us Faithful." It recently suddenly occurred to me that this didn't mean just in the ministry, as we assumed during that long-ago ordination service. It means may He find us faithful in everything, all the time, with our lives. Right now, we are on a detour. Or maybe the detour has become the main road. We don't know that yet. But whatever we are doing, we want to be found faithful. May that be your heart's desire and prayer too!

Lovingly,
Kathi

Place of Rest

I honestly didn't know if I was going to get a blog post written this week. Between working every day and then coming down with a nasty sinus infection, writing didn't look like something that was likely to happen. But in God's grace, He gave me a day at home today to rest. In between resting and taking my medications, I have been blessed to spend my day doing my favorite things - listening to good Christian music, reading, writing, and preparing for an upcoming speaking engagement that God has graciously provided for me.

Today God has also reminded me of something very important - not only physical rest (which I most definitely needed) but the importance of resting in the Lord. When circumstances steal your peace and joy, and make you doubt God's wisdom and goodness to you, the only thing to do is to go back to what you know to be true: the character of God. And the only way to know the character of God is to spend time with Him.

I know I've written about this before. But time and time again, I am convinced that it is THE most important thing in life. I am not talking about reading a quick devotional or a "verse of the day." Those things are good, and certainly better than nothing. I understand there are seasons and situations of life that make extended quality time with God really difficult to come by - I've been there, and I have been going through that myself lately. But if it wasn't for my time with the Lord, I would start to unravel.

Jesus knew the truth of this. In Mark chapter 1, we get a glimpse into His life. He spent His days ministering to others and constantly confronting sin and evil - sound familiar? He was busy to the point where "the whole town was gathered at His door" (vs: 33) But He knew that time alone with His Father was not an option. We are told in verses 35-38 that He made the choice to prepare for the demands of a new day by getting alone with His Father.

It is in the time we take alone with the Lord that we are renewed and refreshed. It is where we are reminded of a particular truth about God, or He points something out to us that we need to know. It has been my experience that throughout the day, Scripture verses meet up with real life. I can be in an unwanted and unexpected situation, and suddenly a verse will pop into my mind. Certain verses carry special memories with them every time I look at them - I can never read or hear Phil. 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" without remembering quoting that over and over when I was put in a cast on our missions trip to Cambodia and had to navigate three flights of stairs on crutches multiple times a day. Just this week I was required to do something that was not what I expected and seemed to be totally unfair, and I was reminded of Psalm 16:5 - "The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup, you hold my lot." and 31:15 - "My times are in Thy hand." I am also comforted that as a child of God, He still has a plan for me. Over and over I have meditated on "For I know the plans I have for you, plans for good and not for evil, to give you an expected end." (Jer. 29:11)

Are you getting the picture? How do I know all these verses? It's certainly not because I am a super-Christian. It's not because I am a pastor's wife. It's the result of walking with God, by His grace, for over 50 years and years of reading and memorizing His Word. I wish I had begun doing this much earlier. It wasn't until I was in my 30's and under the mentorship of a wonderful pastor's wife that I really got a hold on this concept. It's getting the Word into me, not just me in the Word. I am also thankful for a pastor-husband that led his congregation in memorizing Scripture. To this day I can still quote most of Romans chapter 8!

As the song I love by Andy Gleiser says, "Forever Rest in My Faithful love." In all that life brings, that is the TRUE place of rest.

Re-defining Blessing

It was only a little sign. But it carried big messages for me.

One afternoon a couple of weeks ago, I was waiting for my husband to finish up some work-related meetings so I was browsing in a nearby store. I came across a $1 clearance bin. Anything that has a $1 price tag on it is just begging to be looked at. So I did. And I came across this little sign:

And since it was only $1, I bought it.

Lesson #1 - When I got home and unwrapped it, I found that although it is wood-grained, it was not made of wood, or even a solid material that is like wood, like I thought. It was plastic over a pressboard frame. (I know, I know...what did I expect for $1?) I was a little disappointed, but no big deal. It did remind me that sometimes things that seem on the surface to be one thing turn out to be something else entirely. Those situations and people in our lives that we may have counted on to be the "real thing" prove to be imitations and not at all what we expected. This is where discernment comes in. As Christians, we need to pray for discernment to be able to differentiate between truth and imitation. Discernment was one of the things Solomon prayed for when he became king in 1 Kings 3:9, which is also a great prayer for us to pray: "Give therefore to thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad, for who is able to judge this so great a people?" We are told in Ephesians 5:8b-10 -"Walk as children of light, for the fruit of the Spirit is found in all that is good and right and true, proving (or discerning) what is pleasing unto the Lord."

Lesson #2 is the reason I bought this little sign in the first place. I put it in my sunny  kitchen window, where it is a constant reminder to me that no matter how bad the day has been or how bleak things may look that my life is full of blessings. "Where we look determines what we see" is a truth that applies to the focus of our hearts. If we choose to look at the problems and trials, the negative circumstances, the things that just don't make sense to us, and the future that seems so uncertain at times, that is all that we will see. We won't even see the blessings in our lives. I need to be reminded constantly that God has blessed me in countless ways every single day.

Those blessings may not come in the form of what we normally think of as blessings. Indeed I have been blessed with salvation, a wonderful husband, a home, children and their spouses that are all loving and serving the Lord in various ministries around the country, ten healthy beautiful grandchildren, health, and innumerable other things. When I went on a missions trip to a third-world country a few years ago, I came home thankful for a great many things I had never thought to be thankful for before - things like soap, hot water, toilet paper, air conditioning, medical supplies, clean water.

But the blessings I am thinking of are not necessarily the tangible ones. They are the answers to prayer. The verse of Scripture that was exactly what I needed. The message or song that spoke to my heart. The direction and guidance He gives through open and closed doors in our lives. The peace that comes from staying my mind on Him. The joy that is mine from having a personal relationship with the Lord. And specifically, the changes in our life and the many lessons He has taught and continues to teach us these past few months since we have been on this journey of major life-change. I know that many changes are taking place and lessons are being learned that we never would have learned any other way.

Eph. 1:3 says - "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places" and then goes on to list those spiritual blessings (or treasures, as my pastor-husband has referred to them as) that we have in Christ. I would encourage you to read verses 3-14 and be blessed. It is right and desirable and good that we thank God for the blessings in our lives, but let's not stop with just the obvious, tangible things that come to mind when we consider what our blessings consist of. Be willing to re-define your previous idea of blessing.

Until next time,
Kathi

True love on Valentine's Day

As I write this post, Valentine's Day is only a couple days away. You would have to be blind not to notice the displays of Valentine cards, flowers, candy, and gifts at the front of each and every store you walk into. And if your email in-box is anything like mine, you are inundated with emails from all kinds of shopping places reminding you of just how many days you have left to purchase the perfect Valentine gift or outfit, or how to hint to your Valentine what you really want.


A lot of people don't really like Valentine's Day. There are those who are single and without a special someone in their life who jokingly call it "Single Awareness Day."  There are those who do have a spouse or special someone in their life but that spouse or special someone is clueless about it being a special day. Why can't they be romantic, for at least one day out of the year?  And for those who have lost their sweetheart, Valentine's Day can be a painful, bittersweet memory.

As I was thinking about this, one thing is certain: Valentines' Day can carry with it a lot of expectations. Due to endless advertising by the media, and the culture of the world around us, we as women sometimes have all these expectations about Valentines Day. If we don't receive a dozen roses, a box of chocolates, a special gift, and/or a nice dinner out, then we must not be loved or appreciated. If we don't have a husband or boyfriend, or we have one who isn't romantic-minded, we feel worthless. This is a good time to remember that our expectations for love and happiness can't be found in our husbands or boyfriends because no one can perfectly fulfill what only the Lord can. Psalm 62:5 - "My soul, wait only upon God, for my expectation is from Him."

On Valentine's Day, it's worth noting that true love is not about getting. It is about giving. It isn't about being served - love serves others. Sometimes love isn't a feeling - it's a choice to sacrifice self and our desires and preferences, and serve someone else.  In John 15 Jesus was giving some final words of instruction to his disciples. In verse 12 He tells us, "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you." I think if we ask ourselves if we really love others the way Christ did, we would go away feeling pretty convicted about our selfish view of love. Reading 1 Corinthians 13 again is a good reminder of what love is like.  True Christ-like love is patient, kind, not envious of others (and what they might get for Valentine's Day). It doesn't insist on having one's own way. It isn't irritable or resentful. That sounds like a very different kind of love from what the world is telling us today, doesn't it?

This Valentine's Day I want to shift focus from getting to giving. But perhaps you are like me, that you really do want to serve or give to your husband or loved one on this special day, but you are short of money or ideas, or both. So I want to devote the rest of this post to some simple ideas that you can do or give at very little cost, but that will convey the right kind of love - that you desire to love and serve the special person in your life. Maybe it's too late to use some of these ideas this Valentine's Day, but you can plan ahead for next year! For simplicity sake, I am going to assume that this person is your husband, but if you don't have a husband I would urge you to apply some of these ideas to other loved ones in your life.

• Make a list of the things that you love and appreciate about your husband, and either write them separately on little notes and put them places for him to read, or type them up and give the list to him inside a special card. I actually did this out of necessity on a special milestone birthday of my husband's when I was recovering from pneumonia and couldn't go out to buy him a birthday gift. I wrote "50 Reasons that I Love You." Both of us still remember this.

• Make up a little gift box or bag of his favorite special treats: His favorite candy bar. A nice pen.  A $5 gift card to a coffee shop, donut place, or fast-food restaurant. You get the idea.

• Text him a Bible verse every day for the next month.

• Bake his favorite cookies or dessert.

• If he has time in the morning before he leaves for work, make him a special breakfast and serve it to him with his coffee.

• Instead of going out to a restaurant for a Valentine dinner, which can be pricey and crowded, make and serve a special Valentine dinner at home. Again, we started this out of necessity years ago when our children were young, my husband was in school, and we had no money. And now many years later we have come to really look forward to this. We enjoy picking out something special together for our menu and cooking together, but if your husband doesn't, you know what he likes. You can make a really special dinner for a fraction of the price of what you would pay for the same dinner out, and it is much more intimate. If you have kids at home, wait until they are in bed and then enjoy your dinner.

• Do something special for him that he doesn't have time for - wash his car, take his suit to the cleaners, buy something he needs that he is almost out of.

• Make him a special present. One year recently I made my husband a prayer journal with pictures of the grandkids on the cover. Or make a coffee mug with a picture of the two of you. You can do this at a website like Shutterfly and it doesn't cost very much.

• For friends or other loved ones, especially your children or grandchildren, remember that a hand-written note or a card from the dollar store can go a long way toward showing them you love them. For little ones, tuck some stickers inside.

These are just a few ideas to get you started. The idea is to think about what you can do to show the  kind of selfless, serving love that Christ desires. I leave you with this very special quote from a little booklet I have by Amy Carmichael entitled "If." This is only an excerpt of the entire poem "Calvary Love."

"If the praise of others elates me and their blame depresses me,
If I cannot rest under misunderstanding without defending myself,
If I love to be loved more than to love, to be served more than to serve,
Then I know nothing of Calvary Love"

Lovingly,
Kathi

Pressing the Pause Button

Welcome February! I love to see the daylight lasting a bit longer each day. January is one of my least-favorite months of the year so I can't say that I am sad to see it end. I hope February is a great month for you! As I think about this new year I am very much aware that 2017 is a special year for my husband and me, as both of us turn 60 this year. I am still not quite sure how that happened! There are some advantages to turning 60 (hello, senior discounts!) but being in the process of searching for a job at my age is not one of them. Potential employers seem to ignore, overlook, or dismiss me, regardless of my experience. It doesn't help that looking for a job these days is vastly different than it used to be, because everything is done online, which doesn't give you a chance to make a favorable impression in person. So right now I am spending a lot of time responding to job openings with applications, resumes, and a lot of prayer!

The other day when someone asked me how things were going, I told them I feel as if someone has pressed the "pause" button in my life. You know the pause button on your remote. When we are watching a movie (something rare for us) or a video on our computer and the phone rings or someone comes to the door, we press the "pause" button. All the action stops. The things that have already happened in whatever we are watching are gone, the present is frozen, and what is yet to take place is still ahead and unknown. In this time of my life when I feel like the "pause" button has been pressed, not a whole lot is happening. A lot of things are gone and not yet replaced with new things. I am waiting for God to provide the right job for me. We are still visiting churches (that's a whole other post. I have learned a lot about how it feels to be an outsider visiting a new church!) and so we continue to wait on God's direction regarding a new church to become a part of. Along with that will come friends and ways to serve. But I am learning to cherish this "pause" time - when we seem to be in between everything  - as a growing time. It won't last forever. It is a time to nourish my soul with lots of reading, meditation, prayer, and writing. It's a time to be learning, and also a time of growing in my relationship with my husband. I am thankful for this "growing" time because it probably would not have happened without this "pause."

There are a lot of verses in the Bible about growing. One of them which I have often used as a prayer for others is 2 Peter 3:18: "But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." Growing in grace is something I continually need - an understanding of the grace of God and extending that grace to others. Growing in the knowledge of our Lord is foundational to growing in other areas, because as we grow in our knowledge of Him we will grow to become more like Him. We tend to become like who we are spending the most time with. So one thing is clear: growth comes from time with the Lord. There aren't any shortcuts. We have to be in the position where we are willing and able to take in what God knows we need in order for us to grow.

Which brings me to this: everyone needs a "pause button" in their life. I understand that there are a lot of women out there who feel like they are on a moving train - moms of young children, wives who are caretakers or helping family members, women who are juggling families and home responsibilities with jobs, ministry wives who are trying to be all things to all people. I get it. I was there. Perhaps you need to press the "pause" button. Ask God to show you in what ways you need to grow. Find ways to make time to nourish your soul by spending time with God, even if it is in 10 minutes snatches. Write out verses on index cards and keep them where you can look at them when you have a minute. Put a Bible app on your phone. Start a new Bible study to challenge yourself. Be intentional about paying attention to where you need to grow and press the pause button to make it happen.

Until next time,
Kathi

My Dining Room Table and Ministry

This morning brought a welcome change as I opened my window blinds and sunshine came pouring into the rooms of my home. Yesterday was one of those dark, cold, rainy, and windy January days when nobody wants to be outside.

But today, as the sun filled every corner of the room, as sunshine always does it illuminated dust and some crumbs on my dining room table.

I got a damp cloth and began wiping the table, and as I did, memory after memory flashed through my mind of years around that dining room table:

• Countless family meals - from when our kids were at home, to just the two of us, to the years when we began squeezing in married children with their spouses and now children and babies.

• The family devotions and planning and talking

• The homework and the homeschooling and test-taking and paper-writing that took place there.

• The craft projects and the scrapbooking that would fill the table and I would have to clear it all so we would have a place to eat.

• The years in Illinois when our decorated table held a bounty of appetizers and special desserts for the Christmas Open House that we hosted for our church every year.

• The many, many times church teenagers and college students gathered around the table for playing games and talking and eating pizza and tacos and sloppy joes.

• The times of fellowship and refreshments enjoyed there when we invited church board members and Sunday School classes and church members to our home.

• The times when we hosted evangelists, missionaries, and other pastors for meals and we would sit around the table for hours afterwards hearing their stories and learning from them. Some of these guests are now in heaven.

• So many times of coffee and counseling and Bible studies and tears and laughter at our table

When we moved, my husband tried to talk me into giving up our table in favor of a smaller one that would fit better into the space at our apartment. I couldn't do it, and because we don't have the money to buy another table, we didn't pursue it. And now I know why it meant so much to me. It's not just a piece of furniture. It is the memories connected with it, and most notably, the ministry that took place around it.

As all these memories filled my mind, I found myself in tears when I recalled all the times of ministry that had happened around our dining room table. A lot of people don't understand the significance of that, or our sadness at not being in full-time ministry right now. And unless you have been called to serve the Lord vocationally and have yielded to that call and spent most of your married life doing nothing but ministry, it probably will seem foreign to you. Simply put, it is about doing what we were called to do. We are trusting the Lord that if it is His will that in His perfect time He will open another door of full-time ministry for us again. If not, we have determined that we will be content in serving in whatever ways He opens to us. Which leads me to this thought:

We can, and should, still serve the Lord no matter what our life situation is.

One of my favorite verses is Ephesians 2:10: "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God has before ordained that we should walk in them." This verse really struck home while I was meditating on serving the Lord. A missionary speaker many years ago explained (and I have heard this same meaning expounded many times since that message) that the word "workmanship" means "masterpiece." Specifically, His "unique piece of poetry." Doesn't that make you understand this verse better? I have never forgotten that.

But the verse goes on to say that we were created to do good works, and God has prepared those ways for us to serve Him in eternity past. That means, friends, that good works and serving is not limited to "ministry."

I began thinking of the "good works" and serving that God has prepared for me, and that I can do right now - things that are just as important as full-time ministry. I want to remember not to lose sight of the everyday opportunities around me when searching for "big" ways to serve the Lord.

I can be a support and helper to my husband.
I can be an encourager and prayer warrior for our children.
I can be a role model of a Godly woman to our daughters and granddaughters.
I can share Scripture verses and the love of God in small kindnesses.
I can make someone's day better instead of harder.
I can teach and encourage through my avenue of writing.

I'm thankful for the years and opportunities of ministry around my dining room table. But as long as God leaves me here, He still has things for me to do. He does for you, too.

I think I will never look at my dining room table in the same way again.

Thoughtfully,
Kathi