Practicing Gratitude

I wish I could say that things at our house have improved a whole lot since last week. I really do. But they haven't. The days of inactivity when my husband was admitted to the hospital for a second time due to having blood clots have resulted in a considerable delay in his recovery. At his post-surgery appointment earlier this week, the doctor was pleased with the healing of his incision, but not with his progress. He prescribed a machine that flexes the knee constantly (Constant Passive Motion) for my husband to use at home up to 8 hours a day, as well as intensive out-patient physical therapy sessions. At this point, more than two weeks after surgery, he is still using a walker because of his inability to raise his leg on his own, which is very discouraging. Driving him to PT and doctor and blood draw appointments is up to me, along with a good share of his daily care. We long for things to get back to "normal" and for him to be able to return to his shepherding of the flock God has given us.

I will be honest. This has been a very difficult time for me. I get tired and with the lack of progress I become discouraged. This trial of surgical complications is added to the trials of my mother-in-law passing away and problems in ministry and the burden of having a house that still hasn't sold. I wake up early in the morning and do a lot of praying. During this time, I am rehearsing something I learned years ago that helps in times of discouragement: choosing gratitude.

Gratitude is one of the main ways that God brings joy to our hearts. When we exercise faith to see the blessings as we pray about our problems, God promises to meet us with peace. (Phil. 4:6-7). It is a matter of perspective. I can choose to focus on the problems and the negatives, or I can focus on the blessings God has given me.

A book that I found to be truly life-changing is "Choosing Gratitude" by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. I have read through it at least twice as well as developed a study guide to use with it. The following is a quote from "Choosing Gratitude."

"In those moments when I have found myself gasping for air, feeling that I was going under, I've discovered that gratitude truly is my life preserver. Even in the most turbulent waters of life, choosing gratitude rescues me from myself and my runaway emotions. It buoys me on the grace of God and keeps me from drowning in what otherwise would be my bent toward doubt, negativity, discouragement, and anxiety."

Many years ago I was challenged to make a list every day of five things I was thankful for that day. Some days it was easy...some days it was a challenge to come up with even three things. It was eye-opening, to say the least. I could not believe the change in my perspective as I began actively looking for things each day that I could be grateful for. No matter how bad the day, if I made the effort and the choice to be grateful, I was rewarded with the peace and contentment that came from recognizing God's faithfulness through His gifts of grace to me.

I have since gotten away from that habit of listing things I can be grateful for, but in recent days I have once again been focusing on choosing to be grateful. I am thankful for wonderful supportive children, including a son who was willing to drop everything and come to stay with me and be involved in his dad's care. I am thankful for good doctors and therapists and medical care. I am thankful for health insurance. I an thankful for a comfortable, air-conditioned home for him to recover in. I am thankful that I am able to be at home and to care for my husband. I am thankful for a loving church family. I am thankful for the gift and privilege of prayer. And even more than those blessings, I am thankful for God Himself - His presence, His love, His Word, and for the assurance that nothing ever happens to me without first passing through the hands of my Heavenly Father.

Gratefully,
Kathi