The Light in My Window

The Light in My Window

Friday, May 19, 2017

Giving Up Control

I have an amazing husband. I really do.

Some of you may have seen my post on Facebook about the wonderful dinner he cooked and served me when I came home from work one evening this week. He cleaned up the kitchen, too! He has never hesitated to pitch in and help, whether it be cooking or dishes or laundry.

During the course of our marriage, I have always pretty much taken charge of the house and all the related tasks. I thoroughly enjoy everything about homemaking, and after 41 years I am pretty good at it. But since I began working full-time a couple months ago, we really have been working together as a team. If he gets home from work before I do, he cooks. If he's working at night and home during the day, he'll do some of the laundry or run to the grocery store instead of me having to do it. When it comes to the finances and bill paying, I have always taken care of that as well, but now he might be the one who goes to the bank or pays the bills.

Don't misunderstand me! I am definitely not complaining! I am very blessed to have that kind of a husband. But for me, there is a difficult side to this. I have been doing these things for a very long time - and I am used to having complete control over what I do. He often doesn't do things the way I do. No longer being in charge means that sometimes I have items on my grocery list and I look in the refrigerator or pantry and see my husband has already bought them. I don't know what clothes are clean and what is still in the hamper. I have to check to see the status of our finances. After so many years, it is a bit of an adjustment to not feel in control of things at home.

Losing control can be an uncomfortable feeling but it is ultimately a good thing. Likewise, often I have struggled with the Lord over who is in control of my life. I have my plans and my idea of how things should go and how they should turn out. And more often than not, life doesn't go that way. Never have I been so out of control of my life as I have been this past year, when everything suddenly changed and nothing turned out as we had planned. In fact, that is one thing that the Lord has really driven home to me these past months: We may plan and we may think we are in control, but God's plans will stand. Proverbs 16:9 - "The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." And Proverbs 19:21 - "Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." 

Plans - it's kind of ironic that I work for the county planning department and I work around plans every day. Plans are something that we  put a lot of thought and work into, and we think they should be set in stone. But when we give our lives to the Lord, we need to realize that we are no longer in control. God desires that we submit our will to His. And God in His love and wisdom does a much better job at being in control of our lives. While we may have Plan A, God's plan is really Plan A, even though it may be quite different than ours. And God's plan is always better.

I am reminded of the words to this song that is sung by Mac and Beth Lynch:

With my whole heart I humbly seek you;
Now use my life, O Lord, I pray.
I yield my stubborn will completely,
May your commandments light my way.

My life, Lord, is yours to control;
I give you my heart and my soul.
I'll seek your will, never mine,
Rich treasure to find.
Give wisdom to choices I make,
Along every path that I take.
So when I complete life's race,
"Well done" you will say.

And in the end, that's what it's all about.

Lovingly,
Kathi








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