The Light in My Window

The Light in My Window

Monday, February 20, 2017

Re-defining Blessing

It was only a little sign. But it carried big messages for me.

One afternoon a couple of weeks ago, I was waiting for my husband to finish up some work-related meetings so I was browsing in a nearby store. I came across a $1 clearance bin. Anything that has a $1 price tag on it is just begging to be looked at. So I did. And I came across this little sign:
And since it was only $1, I bought it.

Lesson #1 - When I got home and unwrapped it, I found that although it is wood-grained, it was not made of wood, or even a solid material that is like wood, like I thought. It was plastic over a pressboard frame. (I know, I know...what did I expect for $1?) I was a little disappointed, but no big deal. It did remind me that sometimes things that seem on the surface to be one thing turn out to be something else entirely. Those situations and people in our lives that we may have counted on to be the "real thing" prove to be imitations and not at all what we expected. This is where discernment comes in. As Christians, we need to pray for discernment to be able to differentiate between truth and imitation. Discernment was one of the things Solomon prayed for when he became king in 1 Kings 3:9, which is also a great prayer for us to pray: "Give therefore to thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad, for who is able to judge this so great a people?" We are told in Ephesians 5:8b-10 -"Walk as children of light, for the fruit of the Spirit is found in all that is good and right and true, proving (or discerning) what is pleasing unto the Lord."

Lesson #2 is the reason I bought this little sign in the first place. I put it in my sunny  kitchen window, where it is a constant reminder to me that no matter how bad the day has been or how bleak things may look that my life is full of blessings. "Where we look determines what we see" is a truth that applies to the focus of our hearts. If we choose to look at the problems and trials, the negative circumstances, the things that just don't make sense to us, and the future that seems so uncertain at times, that is all that we will see. We won't even see the blessings in our lives. I need to be reminded constantly that God has blessed me in countless ways every single day.

Those blessings may not come in the form of what we normally think of as blessings. Indeed I have been blessed with salvation, a wonderful husband, a home, children and their spouses that are all loving and serving the Lord in various ministries around the country, ten healthy beautiful grandchildren, health, and innumerable other things. When I went on a missions trip to a third-world country a few years ago, I came home thankful for a great many things I had never thought to be thankful for before - things like soap, hot water, toilet paper, air conditioning, medical supplies, clean water.

But the blessings I am thinking of are not necessarily the tangible ones. They are the answers to prayer. The verse of Scripture that was exactly what I needed. The message or song that spoke to my heart. The direction and guidance He gives through open and closed doors in our lives. The peace that comes from staying my mind on Him. The joy that is mine from having a personal relationship with the Lord. And specifically, the changes in our life and the many lessons He has taught and continues to teach us these past few months since we have been on this journey of major life-change. I know that many changes are taking place and lessons are being learned that we never would have learned any other way.

Eph. 1:3 says - "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places" and then goes on to list those spiritual blessings (or treasures, as my pastor-husband has referred to them as) that we have in Christ. I would encourage you to read verses 3-14 and be blessed. It is right and desirable and good that we thank God for the blessings in our lives, but let's not stop with just the obvious, tangible things that come to mind when we consider what our blessings consist of. Be willing to re-define your previous idea of blessing.

Until next time,
Kathi

Monday, February 13, 2017

True love on Valentine's Day

As I write this post, Valentine's Day is only a couple days away. You would have to be blind not to notice the displays of Valentine cards, flowers, candy, and gifts at the front of each and every store you walk into. And if your email in-box is anything like mine, you are inundated with emails from all kinds of shopping places reminding you of just how many days you have left to purchase the perfect Valentine gift or outfit, or how to hint to your Valentine what you really want.


A lot of people don't really like Valentine's Day. There are those who are single and without a special someone in their life who jokingly call it "Single Awareness Day."  There are those who do have a spouse or special someone in their life but that spouse or special someone is clueless about it being a special day. Why can't they be romantic, for at least one day out of the year?  And for those who have lost their sweetheart, Valentine's Day can be a painful, bittersweet memory.

As I was thinking about this, one thing is certain: Valentines' Day can carry with it a lot of expectations. Due to endless advertising by the media, and the culture of the world around us, we as women sometimes have all these expectations about Valentines Day. If we don't receive a dozen roses, a box of chocolates, a special gift, and/or a nice dinner out, then we must not be loved or appreciated. If we don't have a husband or boyfriend, or we have one who isn't romantic-minded, we feel worthless. This is a good time to remember that our expectations for love and happiness can't be found in our husbands or boyfriends because no one can perfectly fulfill what only the Lord can. Psalm 62:5 - "My soul, wait only upon God, for my expectation is from Him."

On Valentine's Day, it's worth noting that true love is not about getting. It is about giving. It isn't about being served - love serves others. Sometimes love isn't a feeling - it's a choice to sacrifice self and our desires and preferences, and serve someone else.  In John 15 Jesus was giving some final words of instruction to his disciples. In verse 12 He tells us, "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you." I think if we ask ourselves if we really love others the way Christ did, we would go away feeling pretty convicted about our selfish view of love. Reading 1 Corinthians 13 again is a good reminder of what love is like.  True Christ-like love is patient, kind, not envious of others (and what they might get for Valentine's Day). It doesn't insist on having one's own way. It isn't irritable or resentful. That sounds like a very different kind of love from what the world is telling us today, doesn't it?

This Valentine's Day I want to shift focus from getting to giving. But perhaps you are like me, that you really do want to serve or give to your husband or loved one on this special day, but you are short of money or ideas, or both. So I want to devote the rest of this post to some simple ideas that you can do or give at very little cost, but that will convey the right kind of love - that you desire to love and serve the special person in your life. Maybe it's too late to use some of these ideas this Valentine's Day, but you can plan ahead for next year! For simplicity sake, I am going to assume that this person is your husband, but if you don't have a husband I would urge you to apply some of these ideas to other loved ones in your life.
  • Make a list of the things that you love and appreciate about your husband, and either write them separately on little notes and put them places for him to read, or type them up and give the list to him inside a special card. I actually did this out of necessity on a special milestone birthday of my husband's when I was recovering from pneumonia and couldn't go out to buy him a birthday gift. I wrote "50 Reasons that I Love You." Both of us still remember this.
  • Make up a little gift box or bag of his favorite special treats: His favorite candy bar. A nice pen.  A $5 gift card to a coffee shop, donut place, or fast-food restaurant. You get the idea.
  • Text him a Bible verse every day for the next month.
  • Bake his favorite cookies or dessert.
  • If he has time in the morning before he leaves for work, make him a special breakfast and serve it to him with his coffee.
  • Instead of going out to a restaurant for a Valentine dinner, which can be pricey and crowded, make and serve a special Valentine dinner at home. Again, we started this out of necessity years ago when our children were young, my husband was in school, and we had no money. And now many years later we have come to really look forward to this. We enjoy picking out something special together for our menu and cooking together, but if your husband doesn't, you know what he likes. You can make a really special dinner for a fraction of the price of what you would pay for the same dinner out, and it is much more intimate. If you have kids at home, wait until they are in bed and then enjoy your dinner.
  • Do something special for him that he doesn't have time for - wash his car, take his suit to the cleaners, buy something he needs that he is almost out of.
  • Make him a special present. One year recently I made my husband a prayer journal with pictures of the grandkids on the cover. Or make a coffee mug with a picture of the two of you. You can do this at a website like Shutterfly and it doesn't cost very much.
  • For friends or other loved ones, especially your children or grandchildren, remember that a hand-written note or a card from the dollar store can go a long way toward showing them you love them. For little ones, tuck some stickers inside.
These are just a few ideas to get you started. The idea is to think about what you can do to show the  kind of selfless, serving love that Christ desires. I leave you with this very special quote from a little booklet I have by Amy Carmichael entitled "If." This is only an excerpt of the entire poem "Calvary Love."

"If the praise of others elates me and their blame depresses me,
If I cannot rest under misunderstanding without defending myself,
If I love to be loved more than to love, to be served more than to serve,
Then I know nothing of Calvary Love"

Lovingly,
Kathi




Monday, February 6, 2017

Pressing the Pause Button

Welcome February! I love to see the daylight lasting a bit longer each day. January is one of my least-favorite months of the year so I can't say that I am sad to see it end. I hope February is a great month for you! As I think about this new year I am very much aware that 2017 is a special year for my husband and me, as both of us turn 60 this year. I am still not quite sure how that happened! There are some advantages to turning 60 (hello, senior discounts!) but being in the process of searching for a job at my age is not one of them. Potential employers seem to ignore, overlook, or dismiss me, regardless of my experience. It doesn't help that looking for a job these days is vastly different than it used to be, because everything is done online, which doesn't give you a chance to make a favorable impression in person. So right now I am spending a lot of time responding to job openings with applications, resumes, and a lot of prayer!

The other day when someone asked me how things were going, I told them I feel as if someone has pressed the "pause" button in my life. You know the pause button on your remote. When we are watching a movie (something rare for us) or a video on our computer and the phone rings or someone comes to the door, we press the "pause" button. All the action stops. The things that have already happened in whatever we are watching are gone, the present is frozen, and what is yet to take place is still ahead and unknown. In this time of my life when I feel like the "pause" button has been pressed, not a whole lot is happening. A lot of things are gone and not yet replaced with new things. I am waiting for God to provide the right job for me. We are still visiting churches (that's a whole other post. I have learned a lot about how it feels to be an outsider visiting a new church!) and so we continue to wait on God's direction regarding a new church to become a part of. Along with that will come friends and ways to serve. But I am learning to cherish this "pause" time - when we seem to be in between everything  - as a growing time. It won't last forever. It is a time to nourish my soul with lots of reading, meditation, prayer, and writing. It's a time to be learning, and also a time of growing in my relationship with my husband. I am thankful for this "growing" time because it probably would not have happened without this "pause."

There are a lot of verses in the Bible about growing. One of them which I have often used as a prayer for others is 2 Peter 3:18: "But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." Growing in grace is something I continually need - an understanding of the grace of God and extending that grace to others. Growing in the knowledge of our Lord is foundational to growing in other areas, because as we grow in our knowledge of Him we will grow to become more like Him. We tend to become like who we are spending the most time with. So one thing is clear: growth comes from time with the Lord. There aren't any shortcuts. We have to be in the position where we are willing and able to take in what God knows we need in order for us to grow.

Which brings me to this: everyone needs a "pause button" in their life. I understand that there are a lot of women out there who feel like they are on a moving train - moms of young children, wives who are caretakers or helping family members, women who are juggling families and home responsibilities with jobs, ministry wives who are trying to be all things to all people. I get it. I was there. Perhaps you need to press the "pause" button. Ask God to show you in what ways you need to grow. Find ways to make time to nourish your soul by spending time with God, even if it is in 10 minutes snatches. Write out verses on index cards and keep them where you can look at them when you have a minute. Put a Bible app on your phone. Start a new Bible study to challenge yourself. Be intentional about paying attention to where you need to grow and press the pause button to make it happen.

Until next time,
Kathi